Told by Jemma.
I was glad that Stevan was able to come to Blue’s birthday party. Even if he seemed a little off or something.
I didn’t want any cake. I just wanted to talk to Stevan. I was getting tired of this shit.
“Man, last night’s shift was crazy. I’m still exhausted. Want a drink, babe?”
“No, I want you to pick up your daughter.”
“Uhhh… right now?”
“Yes, right now! You’ve barely even seen her yet!”
I felt like my head was gonna explode… but I kept my cool.
“Okay, after I finish this drink.”
I was speechless. Did he really not even care about holding his daughter?
“Stevan. You love me, don’t you?”
“Yes baby, of course!”
“Well, I need to see you show it more. I mean, it seems like I am doing everything. Like, I’m always the one who calls you and comes over any hour of the night. You never call me first.”
“I do! I call you sometimes!”
“I need to see you try harder, dammit! And I want Jovanna to get to know her daddy.”
We chatted a bit more, nothing too monumental, but he did say he was really going to try harder. After he had a few drinks, I told him he shouldn’t drive and he could stay here. So I went to fetch Jemma. She had wandered off in the other room so I let her drink her baba by herself, ’cause frankly I didn’t care.
I hated her.
And I loved her.
Just like I hated Stevan.
And I loved him.
Why do I keep doing this to myself?
The more I held her, the more I fell in love with her.
Though I didn’t always too do well with caring for her, because sometimes I think I purposely ignored her.
I wondered if it would ever change.
And if we were really meant to be.
Tegan: “You guys need to get your own place.”
“That might be nice.”
“But I like it at home.”
“So you’re here again.”
“Oh hi, Mr. Watley.”
“Ya know, I have a blue belt in Simfu. Isn’t that cool?”
“It’s all about strength training, and precise, definite hits.”
“And all I need is a dummy to practice on.”
Sharona: “Garrick, are you indirectly threatening that boy?”
“Okay, lemme say this.”
“I’m pregnant. And pregnant women can get very emotional. As you’ve likely seen with Jemma.”
“She’s my daughter, and I love her very much. And I’m sure you love her too—”
“Mrs. Watley, I—”
“Lemme put it this way, Stevan.”
“You break her and I’ll break you.”
Clearly I had a big decision to make. I decided at least, for now, I needed to start exploring my options.